EXCLUSIVE INTERVIEW - Terri Schiavo!
PanzerMega , 2005/03/29 19:29
DISCLAIMER: This interview is a parody. Any relation to any actual interview with Terri "My Brain Doesn't Work Anymore" Schiavo is purely coincidental. Also, if this offends you, CLICK HERE to go read something less offensive. Also, be sure to send us fanmail, hatemail and lots of money by clicking HERE. We love that shit.
Since I just finished a newspaper writing and journalism course, I figured it would be fitting to get started on professional interviewing with one of the biggest news stories of the past few years. Thanks to a few well-placed contacts, and a mickey in an candystripper’s drink, I can now bring our millions of readers:
An Interview with Terri Shiavo
Hi Terri. How are you?
Huh? What are you currently working on?
Is there anything you’d like to plug?
How about unplug? I’ll help you out if you want.
So how’s the hospital food treating you?
Please rate the following things as either IN or OUT, depending on how you feel about them:
Pasta - drugh
Ice Cream - drugh
Cheeseburgers - drugh
Shrek 2 - grugh
Those Little French Fries With The Smiley Faces - drugh
If you could walk, would you go see the rock band, Waterproof Blonde in concert?
Now that you’re a vegetable, would you ever consider joining GimpsGoneWild?
aruaghgh! rargh! merggh.
So what’s the best part about bulimia?
Please rate the following pictures between 1 and 10. With 10 being someone attractive and mobile, and 1 being someone who would date you.
The Ultimate Warrior
If you could eat, would you eat at a place called The Tendicks Bakery?
Well Terri, is there anything else you’d like to add?
I want to live!
I’m sorry, I was just checking my text messages, what did you just say?
Well, it looks like the reports are true. I’m deeply sorry to report that Terri Shiavo’s mental facilities really aren’t all there anymore, and she should probably be put down like a horse. I wonder if they can make glue from vegetables.
BEFORE TERRI SCHIAVO GETS SENT TO THE GLUE FACTORY IN THE SKY, CHECK OUT OUR OTHER ARTICLES!
--Don't Feed Terri!
--Michael Schiavo - He's Just Misunderstood!!!
--JasonRivera.com Forums "What Day Will Terri Schiavo Die?" Poll!
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